Category Archives: Letters

Dear Dan Harmon re: Season 2

Dear Dan, How’s that second season for Harmonquest coming along? Just checking. It’s hard to tell from my vantage point in your office parking lot. Lotsa love, –John p.s. Thanks for the expanded universe clips. They’re fun. More. MOre. MORe. … Continue reading

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An Open Letter to Hollywood, and an Offer of Cookies

Dear Hollywood, Now’s your chance. Now’s your chance to become the arm of the progressive liberal movement that the right wing has always shrilly accused you of being (clutching pearls optional). And there will be cookies involved. Let’s go back … Continue reading

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An Open Letter to Dan Harmon of HarmonQuest

Dear Dan Harmon of HarmonQuest, I have enjoyed the entire run of HarmonQuest too many times now to count. Even our two month-old baby has seen it a few times–mostly because it’s 3 a.m. and I have control of the … Continue reading

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More from Helpful John

Q. You know that trick where you throw spaghetti on the wall to see if it sticks, and if it does, you know it’s done? What are your thoughts? (Chef Garcon Arde) A. Only that it’s important to occasionally scrape … Continue reading

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Friday’s Mailbag: reviewing book submissions about…

This week’s myserious mis-delivered mail features a linen white business envelope with a folded letter within. There are some adhesive marks on the back which suggest that it may have once been attached to a larger package. No package exists … Continue reading

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Friday Mailbag: Existential Detectivery

Today’s awkward mail sent to me, but not for me, comes first in a plain brown business envelope of the sort one doesn’t see much these days. Within on engraved business stationery is thus: Dear Ms. Malin, As you know, … Continue reading

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Friday Mailbag Returns with Lost Books

It’s been a while since strange mail has arrived at my doorstep. Mail left with me, but not addressed to me. Rarely, in fact, is there any sensible address for addressee or returnee. So I read my strange mail. First … Continue reading

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Friday’s Mail — making a list. It’s the Least I Could Do

Welcome to Friday! Today’s mailbox contained no envelopes, but two handwritten notes. The first note appears on paper yellowed with age in a rusty-brown colored ink. Dear Mr. Grocer, Please receive this, our list of monthly supply requests. I know … Continue reading

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Friday Mailbox: Look out for Dr. Gregorii

Welcome to Friday, and welcome to the mailbag–which is actually a mailbox if you want to get technical about it. The first piece of mail comes in a plain white business envelope from a Manhattan address. It reads: Dear Sir(s), … Continue reading

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